Its just painful

I had the opportunity to attend the good Friday service at our church and it was amazing.  I took the whole day off adoption stuff to focus on Jesus and what He did for us on the cross. It had not crossed my mind that although I am leaning on God through this process and constantly pouring my heart out to Him I am not taking enough time to simply thank Him for being Him.  It was such a relief to just focus on Him for a whole day and let Him work in my heart.

I realized that I think about the adoption entirely too much.  I think about how we will get the money most of the time and this is just doubt.  It felt so good to tell God that I am just not going to think about it anymore.  It is absolutely PAINFUL waiting and not knowing.  I feel like a part of our family is missing and it kills me!  I yearn for our children in Ethiopia like I never imagined I would.  But I WILL patiently wait on the Lord.

Psalm 90:13-17
Satisfy us each morning with your unfailing love,
so we may sing for joy to the end of our lives.
Give us gladness in proportion to our former misery!
Replace the evil years with good.
Let us, your servants, see you work again;
let our children see your glory.
And may the Lord our God show us his approval
and make our efforts successful.
Yes, make our efforts successful!

I have gotten word that our application has been accepted by A Love Beyond Border.  Now that all of their staff is back from Africa, things should move at a much quicker pace.  They sent out our contract today.  After we sign it and send it back, we should get assigned a dossier assistant who will help us get all of our paperwork together.  I am hoping to already have most of the paperwork and not have to re-due too many documents.

We are holding at $11,080 for the amount we still need to get on the list.  We did just sell our first T-shirt which is a blessing and very exiting!